


Don't You Have an Elsewhere to Be?

by mythras_fire



Series: Friday Night Chats Plot-Bunny Factory [3]
Category: Roswell New Mexico (TV 2019)
Genre: Buffy the Vampire Slayer References, Dialogue-Only, Domestic Boyfriends, M/M, cuddles and ice cream
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-03-17
Updated: 2019-03-17
Packaged: 2019-11-21 08:55:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 900
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18140087
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mythras_fire/pseuds/mythras_fire
Summary: "Okay, you've got yourself a deal, cowboy. Do you even have a tv in here? I haven't noticed one.""Well, you've got a laptop, don't you? We can just watch it on that. In bed naked, as nature intended.""I knew there was a reason I loved you."





	Don't You Have an Elsewhere to Be?

**Author's Note:**

> For bgn, who remembers _Buffy_ as fondly as I do (๑˃̵ᴗ˂̵)
> 
> Disclaimer: all pop culture references and characters belong to their respective creators.

~*~

"Mmmm, cuddles and mint'n'chip ice cream. What more could a man ask for?"

"Sex and mint’n’chip ice cream?"

"Too sticky."

"That depends on where you're putting it."

"Like I said. Too sticky."

"I'm not sure I want to know now where you'd be putting your ice cream, private."

"Well fine, be that way. I wasn't gonna tell you no way no how, cowboy."

"You're cute when you pout."

"And now there's ice cream on my nose, what the fuck, Guerin."

"Is that one of the spots you think would be too sticky?"

"No, but I can't reach it with my tongue to clean it off either."

"There, how's that?"

"Mmmm... much better. Thanks, Xander."

"Um, no. I know this is hard for you but repeat after me. Mi—chael."

"Oh, you poor deprived man, do you mean to tell me you don't know that reference?"

"I'm not the one who's calling his boyfriend by another man's name, thankyouverymuch. You're just lucky I don't know any Xand— hey, is that a Buffy reference?"

"Fashionably late to the party, I like it. Yes, that is a Buffy reference. A very cute one in my opinion. Cute and innocent Willow and Xander from season... two, I think? Before everything literally went to hell in a handbasket."

"I got to see some of it at the group home. Some of the older girls would watch reruns of it or rent it on VHS."

"Did you ever get to see the first couple of seasons? Those were my favorite. It got too dark for me later on, I just couldn't after season five. They should have left Buffy in—oh shit, sorry, I don't want to spoil you in case you want to watch it sometime."

"We could watch it together, if you want. That'd be nice. Because no, I don't think I got to see much of the beginning, I was too young when it was first on, and it wasn't exactly on my to-do list when I got older, y'know."

"Yeah? That'd be fun. More cuddling and mint’n’chip ice cream plus a Buffy seasons 1-2, possibly 3 marathon. I'm down. A vampire with a soul. I love me some Angel. And Spike. The first bad boy I ever liked."

"You do seem to have a yen for tall, dark and handsome. Didn't he get his own show later?"

"My, aren't we modest today. Yeah, he did. I tried watching it but it was kinda dark, too, which is fine if you like that sort of thing. I had enough of that in real life, though, so... I think he was a tad bit depressed, to be honest. Didn't watch too much of it, maybe just the first season-ish."

"A depressed vampire, you say. Gee, where have I heard that before—oh yes, only every Anne Rice novel ever."

"Hah, really?"

"Ok, well, no, because I haven't read all of them, just _Entrevista con el vampiro_ and _Lestat, el vampiro_. One of these days I need to tackle _La reina de los condenados_. But still, if anyone knows how to write vampire pathos, it's Anne Rice. That lady has class."

"You... read Anne Rice... in Spanish. Of course, you did."

"Why are you shaking your head at me, private? Your cute little dimple is showing."

"No poking the dimple! Just marveling at how lucky I am."

"I'm pretty sure I'm the lucky one, but let's not get stuck in one of those 'no you are', 'no you are' mobius loops; I want my ice cream to stay in my stomach where it belongs. It was only yummy going down. The same does not hold true on the way back up."

"Okay, you've got yourself a deal, cowboy. Do you even have a tv in here? I haven't noticed one."

"Well, you've got a laptop, don't you? We can just watch it on that. In bed naked, as nature intended."

"I knew there was a reason I loved you."

"Because of my critical thinking skills?"

"No, because of your curls. I lied earlier. I love your curls more. I just didn't want to hurt your feelings."

"I'm beginning to see now why you were still single when you came home from Iraq."

"Ugh. Don't you have an elsewhere to be?"

"Cordelia!"

"Of course, you remember her. Hmpf. Figures."

"Hey, Cordelia was hot stuff. So popular. So standoffish—"

"So air-headed."

"Now, now, private, let's not throw stones."

"But she was always so mean to Xander. And then when she developed a crush on him, she got even bitchier!"

"Yeah, well, love makes you—"

"Do the wacky!"

"Uhh, I was gonna say 'a little chemically unbalanced', but sure, that works, too."

"Ok, that's it. We're definitely watching it now. I don't think I can handle having to explain every third thing I say to you because you don't know it's a Buffy reference."

"That's quite the quippy gal, there."

"Oh man, you have no idea! That entire show could have been told just by using their quotable quotes and it still would've kicked ass."

"I have a sneaking suspicion I'm about to learn a whole bunch of them."

"Ahh, see, there's that genius brain I fell in love with all those years ago. *kiss* The curls are just a gorgeous bonus."

"Oh, how you flatter me. *kiss* Ok, go, before your head explodes, you big fat dork."

~*~


End file.
